Motherhood Series with Steph Schipp

IN HER WORDS

featuring

Steph Schipp

Perth  •  Mother of Poppy (12 Weeks Old)

There are people in your life who, when they speak, make you stop everything and just listen. Steph is one of those people.

I've known Steph for years, long before either of us were mothers. We met through a mutual friend who brought together a group of women for a Wine Appreciation Club. We'd gather every couple of months, try a different variety of wine, and somehow, over bottles of red and white, build the kind of friendships that last. That group of girls is still very much my core circle. We've celebrated so many milestones together, and now, one of the most beautiful ones yet, welcoming Steph's daughter Poppy into the world.

For the majority of the time I've known her, Steph has been the picture of composed, polished elegance. A corporate girl through and through. A lover of high-end fashion. Always immaculate, always beautifully put together. And now she is a mother, and every time I talk to her about her journey, I end up in tears. She speaks about it with such depth, such love and grace. She is exactly where she is meant to be, and I couldn't be more excited to share her words with you.

Here is Steph, in her words.

 

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When you think back to the moment you became a mother, what do you remember most clearly?

There are 2 distinct moments I remember when I think of the moment I became a mother. The first was seeing that pink "positive" line on the pregnancy test 2 days before we were due to start IVF. It was a mix of immense joy and disbelief.

The second moment was when I saw Poppy's face for the first time, and it was the most intense feeling of relief and pure joy that she was finally here. I often think back to that day, it was as though the world around us stopped and it was just us 3 existing in an unbreakable bubble of love.

 

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What surprised you about motherhood that no one really prepared you for?

I thought I understood the depth of a mother's love before… I mean, I have one and I know lots of them. But I truly get it now, and it's so beautifully humbling. I feel like I suddenly understand the meaning of life, and the answer was right in front of me all along. There is a profound bond between a mother and their child that transcends words, the type of bond that can only be felt, and it pleasantly surprises me every day how deeply I can feel that. I wasn't prepared for my brain to completely rewire itself, and for it to come so naturally.

 

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In what ways have you grown or changed since becoming a mother?

The world looks and feels so different to me since becoming a mother. Having my first baby at 40 means I've spent years watching those around me become mums first, and yearning to become one myself whilst a tiny voice in my heart told me to "be patient, your time will come."

It's like life was a giant jigsaw puzzle and then slowly, slowly all the pieces started coming together, and finally now I can see the whole picture. Things that mattered before don't matter anymore, and things I'd never even considered before now occupy space in my thoughts. Overall, I feel a huge sense of calmness and belonging that I've never felt before.

 

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What is a small, ordinary moment with your child that feels deeply meaningful to you?

It's those middle of the night moments for me. Breastfeeding, burping, changing her nappy. The quiet moments when it's just her and I, and the rest of the world is asleep. There is an ephemeral beauty to these moments, breastfeeding especially. It's a season that feels like it lasts forever when you're in it, yet you know it will be over in a heartbeat. An experience that is precious but fleeting in the grand scheme of things. What an absolute privilege to be the one that she needs for nourishment and comfort in the stillness of the night.

 

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What does love look like when you're exhausted?

It's finding that tiny bit of extra gas in the tank when you think it's empty. Sometimes it looks like asking for or accepting help when you need it. Love when I'm exhausted is the love that I receive in return from those around me, just as much as the love I'm giving.

Something that has been particularly special about being a new mum is getting to spend so much more time with my own mum. I've never appreciated or understood her more than I do right now. Watching her dote on Poppy with such tenderness and care brings back the fondest childhood memories.

 

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Is there a daily ritual that grounds you in this season of motherhood?

This is a really simple one, but it's a hot shower. A moment just for me. A moment to wash away the milk that's been spit up on my shoulders, or leaked from my boobs, the sweat from the night (if you know, you know), to massage my c-section scar. A daily ritual of appreciation for my body that has changed so much to accommodate this season, and that I'm so grateful for.

 

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What do you feel most proud of in your motherhood journey so far?

I'm so incredibly proud of my body that endured severe morning sickness up to 39 weeks, grew an entire perfect little baby girl from scratch, recovered from a major abdominal surgery and now nourishes my baby girl daily. I don't know if I'll ever be as proud of anything as I am of Poppy, though.

 

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What kind of legacy, emotional or otherwise, do you hope to pass on?

This is something I think about a lot. I want her to be confident, self-aware, emotionally intelligent, kind, inquisitive, empathetic. I hope she has all the best qualities that her dad and I possess. I want to share my life lessons with her so she can learn from my mistakes as well as her own. I hope as a family we create rituals, a culture and memories that stay with her long after we're gone, and that she recreates with a family of her own one day.

 

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If you could speak to yourself at the beginning of motherhood, what would you say?

I feel like I'm still at the beginning of it really, but something I tell myself daily is to mindfully soak in every moment and just be present. Take it slowly and cherish this time with Poppy because she is growing so quickly. There is no such thing as too many cuddles, kisses or I love you's.

 

Steph, thank you for trusting this space with your words. For speaking about love and becoming with such openness and grace. Your story will sit with so many mothers, those deep in the middle-of-the-night feeds, those still waiting and hoping, those looking back with tender hearts. You are exactly where you're meant to be, and Poppy is so lucky to call you hers.

With warmth and love,

Kirst x

P.S. With Steph's story we're rounding out this season of In Her Words, and I'll be taking a small break before we return. If you know a mother whose story deserves to be shared, I'd love to hear from you.